Monday, July 17, 2006

Silent Snow

The sound of snow softly falling outside comforted me as I lie in bed. He wasn't home yet, the man I both feared and loved, though I knew he would be soon.

"The comp'ny christmas party won't be over 'til late," he slurred, already drunk. "But you be awake when I get home. I have plans for tonight."

I knew what he wanted. It was the same thing he always wanted late at night when the house was silent and dark; privacy ensured for the visit he had in mind.

My heart beat quickly in my chest and my breathing was far too shallow. Each noise stopped my breath completely and I was certain it was him coming home...coming for me. I made myself as small as I could within my bed, already completely covered with as many blankets as possible. With each sound my dread of what would happen built until silent tears slipped unnoticed down my cheeks and I was holding my breath for fear of being found.

Until I couldn't stand it any longer. Until I felt light headed and my chest hurt.

I couldn't stand it any longer.

Without a sound I crept from the bed, bringing the biggest comforter with me. Silently I wrapped the big blanket around me and tiptoed from the room. I knew where I wanted to go, could walk there blindfolded.

The one place I felt safe, loved.

Part of my fear lightened as I slipped silently from the house to the backyard. He'd never look for me where I was going. He would, in fact, tear the house apart looking for me. He would never consider my disobedience by leaving the house.

The snow was cold yet oddly comforting on my bare feet as I walked to my destination. Not 100 feet from the back door there were dog pens. Built for hunting dogs in training, each pen had a partially buried 'house' that was made of hard plastic. Made this way to make it cool in the summer and warm in the winter, it was a perfect haven for me.

I went to my favorite dog's pen and softly called her name. She was out in an instant and happy to see me. Silently I entered the pen and crawled into the little 'house'. I curled up and felt Lady curl up around me.

For a moment I listened to the sound of snow falling all around me. That sound of silence, the peaceful quiet that comes from knowing that nothing can harm you where you're at.

I knew I would be safe there.

I rested my head on Lady's ribs and finally found sleep.

~~~

I still love the sound of snow falling. It brings me a sense of peace that can only be found in knowing that you're completely safe, loved, and carefree.

Thoughts in Miss Megumi's mind @ 2:51 AM

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